"But I love the bones of you, that I cannot escape"

Rain is a powerful catharsis,
A relief for strong emotion.
I stand on the cliff,
Overlooking the sea.

The wind picks up, a cloud of flying birds engulfs my vision,
Flying, gliding around my head
I can see the tide rising in the distance, the waves, a gentle slap on the skin of the
sand.
Bird bones sat silent on the seashore.

They're approaching me now, those bird bones, carried by the sea waves.
A beautiful decay, of your soul.
Of the colors of the rainbow.
I stand and watch them dance with the sea, around my toes.

The waves crash now.
The sky, a blue-gray, like the haze of your eyes.
The sun, non-existant, absent in the abyss.
The rain steadily approaches still.

The storm rolls in now.
The bird bones shake with fragility.
Your breath graces my face.
I hear the slightest whisper in the wind.

The tide rises now.
Higher, higher, higher.
The rain beats against the surface of the sea.
I can feel the under-toe gripping at my ankles, tiny fingers taunting me.

The sea hugs more of my body, rising.
I raise my arm, but the surface of the water can no longer meet me.
The waves pass above me.
The sea howls and fills in my ear, like a train in the distance.

I bring my knees to my chest and let the sea caress me,
Twirl me around, a delicate dance, a sensual play of movements.
The bird bones brush my skin, I feel them still, falling around me, caught swirling in
the under-toe.
My body, delicately helpless, vulnerable.

My eyes open, the sea stings.
The haze of the sea netting.
Overlapping, crossing over my vision.
The blue-gray of the sky seeping through the surface above me.

The transparent haze of the surface reveals the cliff above me.
There I am, standing, I can hear my voice, screaming.
The fear in my eyes, the tears saturating my face.
The salt of the sea parallels the salt of my body.

A splash behind me, and a slow sinking.
Then another, in a timely matter.
And another, the water rushes around me.
Soon after, another.

In the faint distance, the screaming, of my voice.
The merciless splashes of small bodies breaking the surface high above my head.
The sky gets darker.
A deep blue, then black follows, covering my vision now.

The screaming subsides, fading slowly.
The splashes slow now.
Then the last.
The last tiny body brushes my shoulder and falls below.

The transparent surface is no longer visible, replaced by a wall of black.
I am swallowed by the solidity around me.
I am swallowed, I sink.
I feel the bones under my feet, those tiny fingers, brushing my toes.

My body falls still, against the cold surface of the sea bottom.
The bird bones settle around me, I feel them, brushing.
The sea howling subsides,
I am swallowed, digested into a complete silence, into a complete black.

I am with you now.
I can only remember the storm when I am asleep.

©Adina Weinand